‘Seven Minutes in Heaved’
‘Strip ____’
‘ I never ….’

You ever played those games?

Well guess what?
I never.

Oh it stings.
It makes you feel like you don’t belong.

I listen to my best friend tell me how she kissed someone on a dare and all I can think of is how I should be reacting.

Would I?

Would I regret it later?

Would I even ever get to?

Would my parents ever even let me go out to a late night party in my entire life?

The thoughts never stop attacking you.

Sleepless nights are the result of knowing what you can never have.

I don’t admire the lifestyle.

It is undoubtedly not the kind of life I want.

But just once…
Just once I want to be in that place.
Know what it feels like to be drunk.

All my 14 year old friends know already.
So why do I have to wait for 18?

Eighteen. It’s so promising isn’t it?

Oh I’ll have all the freedom when I’m 18.

What if I don’t?

What if I end up being like those control freaks who know exactly what they want in life?

What if I end up majoring in some kind of serious subject and never have the time to enjoy life?

What if I never get to live these moments?

Will I be the girl who has all the money, but zero happiness?

Dance, now that would be what I really want to do.

But what am I going to do instead? Business.

To make my dad proud.

And I don’t regret it.

I just…

I just….don’t know.

Signing off to Yet Another…
Shanghai Night.